Oanh Nguyen
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Xin lỗi bạn mình gửi thiếu model answer, mình xin gửi lại:
The line graph compares the proportion of income gap between genders in five countries from 1978 to 2008.Overall, there was a decrease in the percentage of difference in incomes of men and women for most of the period. However, after 1998, the percentage gap in gender incomes actually widened in Australia.
It can be seen from the graph that in 1978, there was a different of almost 50% between the incomes of men and women in Japan, compare with around 34% in the USA. Both nations then saw a gradual reduction in these figures, so that by 2008 the proportion of gaps were over 40% and approximate 28%, respectively.
There was also a fall in the incomes gap between genders in the UK and France. In those countries, the percentage different income between men and women was lower than in Japan or the USA. From figures of roughly 30% and just under 20% in the UK and France, respectively, the percentage decline was steady, to 27% in the UK and 18% in France in 2008. In contrast, in 1978, the lowest income gap was in Australia. While this remained at about 8% until 1998, it then grew dramatically to 24% at the end of the period, overtaking the figure for France.
[11/8/2017, 11:58:45 PM] Cám ơn các bạn!
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FROM IELTS PLANET:
Dear _______________,
Congratulations on this good work you’ve created!
You have been making remarkable efforts! Nevertheless, it is advisable that you try to be flexible in terms of structure choosing and paraphrasing. Moreover, try to be extra cautious on your word choice.
My assessments include errors fixing (the highlighted parts), recommendations (the underlined parts), and resources. I have enclosed some website links for reference of ideas, vocabulary as well as the model answer.
Your writing will for sure improve if you keep up with a healthy regular practice pace.
Keep in mind that CONFIDENCE IS THE KEY TO ALL SUCCESS
Thank you for trusting IELTS Planet and Scholarship Planet. Please give us your rating (and feedbacks if possible) so that we can improve our service and deliver assistance of higher quality!
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[11/4/2017, 11:58:58 PM] Cám ơn các bạn!
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Sorry, please use this version
[11/3/2017, 7:59:59 PM] Cám ơn các bạn!
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Bạn thân mến,
Bạn vui lòng gửi lại file bài viết để tụi mình sửa sớm nhất nhé.
Chúc bạn một ngày vui vẻkindly check!
Dear PHAMHONG96.PT,
I am so sorry that my ideas weren’t fully delivered to you. So here’s my clarification:
– Now if I use this question on IELTS Simon, “The graph below shows changes in global food and oil prices between 2000 and 2011.”, then it is safe to say that you have managed most of the paraphrasing part sufficiently. Just one tiny detail needs modifying: food price index => food (The line graph compares the average price of oil per barrel with food from 2000 to 2011.)
– Usually, I would hand-pick some links I find necessary to further help on the weaknesses and to show people my sources as well. It is my apologies for wasting your time. I will take notes and stop including them for you from now on.
Best regards,P.s: If you would be so kind, please call me by my name or Miss next time, because I am certainly not a man. A simple “friend” would work as well
Xin lỗi bạn vì viết không rõ ràng nhé, ý mình là bạn nên tách thành 2 câu để nhấn mạnh mỗi ý của từng câu ấy
Xin lỗi bạn vì trả lời trễ, bạn cần trao đổi gì vậy ạ? Bạn có thể nhắn tin cho mình trên forum nhé.
Bạn thân mến, không biết có bị lỗi gì, hình như mình không đọc được nội dung comment của bạn ạ :(
